I have known that Fred #3 would be here on MLK day for at least a month. I've been telling myself since then that I would have everything clean and the kitchen stocked and ready for the first visit of an in-law since the wedding. He'll be here in exactly 16 hours and all I've done is dust one coffee table and start one load of laundry. I just called my darling husband, #4, at work to ask if he intended to clean anything before the arrival of his dad. "Um, if WE just pick up the living room a little it should be fine." We is the key word here, he doesn't get off work until 11 pm. So I told him that if I had a mouse in my pocket there would be a WE, but I don't...so it's just me. And what about the bedroom? I have one word for it: tornado. I suppose the rest of the house is in order other than a quick pick up in the living room...but still, has he not noticed that we have the remains of a natural disaster in our love nest? No, apparently not. And the worst part? Most of the clothing victims are clean, I'd venture to say that 95% are clean...but darling #4 is against putting clean clothes where they go. He prefers to have everything sprawled out in front of him to choose from while dressing. But I suppose that is what I get for asking him to do the laundry. But I've been using my reserve undies because they are all that are left in my drawer and I'm not brave enough to choose underwear off the floor. And there is no need to wear THOSE now that I'm married....ha ha ha.

And how did I get from my father in-law to slut garb? Because I'm procrastinating.

And how are procrastination and masturbation the same???

You are only fucking yourself.