Have I mentioned that my (well, Carson, Nancy, Frank, and Mandy's) Vet is so beautiful? Well, he is. I love going to see him. I drive 15-20 minutes to his office; it's in Lewisville.

This morning at 7ish Vic asked me if I'd go clean up Frank's crate because he has destroyed his pillow that his Aunt Meestee had made him, and he was leaving for work. SO I drug myself out of bed, got a trash bag, and began picking up the cotton fluff from ALL over the room. Once done, I told him to get back in and go to sleep. I was sitting on the floor at this time and he was looking at me weird. He was kind of shaking and ducking his tail between his legs. So I pulled him to me and he flipped over on his back. I thought he was just being cute, not wanting to go back to bed. Then I saw it. Giant knots in his stomach. It almost looked like he'd grown his balls back. I wigged out. I just knew he'd eaten so much of the pillow stuffing (and the metal rivits out of Nancy's collar yesterday....) that his intestins were twisted and stuck or sumthin'. So I called Vic, my Mom and the Vet. I hurried and showered and rushed him to Lewisville so he could be checked out.

When we got into the room, Mr. Pretty Vet came in, picked him up, flipped him over on the table and died laughing. Seems Mr. Frank was having an erection. How the hell was I supposed to know that boy dogs have the ability to "grab" on to the female dog during sex so they can't get away? I swear, it was the size of a golf ball on each side...he said that he was shaking and ducking his tail because he's a teenage boy that doesn't know what to do with all these feelings.

I wanted to crawl under a rock and die! I was so embarrassed. He was kind enough not to charge me though; he said "How could I charge you...you made my day!"

SO then I had to call my Mom and Vic and tell them...they both laughed. My Mom told my Dad, he laughed too. I wish that someone other than me had seen it; they would have thought he was seriously ill too. But just keep in mind those of you who have male dogs...even if they are de-balled...they still get woodies that look strangely similar to balls.